Axe To Grind

Do you think run-of-the-mill murderers get upset about the undue recognition axe murderers get? Man, I would. It’s all so unfair. You shoot someone and you’re not a Gun Murderer, or you cook your roommate some Drano Waffles and you’re not a Household Cleanser Murderer, but you whack one measely guy with a hatchet and suddenly you’re in a class of your own. I guess cannibals get singled-out too, but, you know, if you’re willing to go that extra mile and eat someone, I figure you’re entitled to some extra credit. Axe murderers, though — those guys are getting something for nothing. They’re a bunch of glory hogs, that’s the real problem.