Cary Grant Is Dead

On the bus, a woman is sitting in the frontmost seat chatting with the driver:Woman: When they make a movie about your life, who is going to play you? Driver: Well, the man who would have played me just died today. Woman: Oh, Gregory Peck! Driver: Yep. Woman: You know that other guy just died, too. David Brinkley. I wonder

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Movies: Matrix Reloaded

Matrix Reloaded is so-so. As "middle chapters" go it's sure no Empire Strikes Back, and it ain't no Two Towers either. And that's understandable, I guess. But what's really disappointing is that, when you get right down to it, Reloaded isn't even on par with The Matrix itself. What The Matrix did so well was to reveal just enough of

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Errata

Washington Post correction: A June 8 profile of actress Jane Alexander incorrectly identified a senator she described in her memoir. It was Sen. Strom Thurmond (R-S.C.) whom she described as "a taut, leathery gnome of a man with hair a color not found in nature." It was also Thurmond who asked her, "Aren't you a moral woman?"Found in The Note.

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Baron Harkonnen Says WMDs Will Be Found

Baron Vladimir Harkonnen today reiterated his insistence that Arrakis possesses worms of mass destruction, despite growing skepticism that proof of WMDs will ever be found. "We know for a fact that they have worms," Vladimir said in a statement to the Emperor, "but it will take time to uncover them, as they are likely hidden deep underground." Rival houses, however,

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Cold Comfort

A man stands on a corner in downtown Seattle. He is loudly sobbing, with one hand over his eyes and the other dangling at his side clutching a cell phone. A woman stands at his side, consoling him with one arm half draped over his shoulders. As I pass I hear her say, "I don't know why you are so

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Clap For Victory

Alan Graham of Trial & Error provides proof of conceptRemember a few years back when the big fad was those keychains that loudly beeped when you clapped your hands, thereby allowing you to find them when misplaced? You know, if the CIA had been smart they would have snuck into Iraq before the war and put one of those suckers

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Bad Review Revue: All “2 Fast” Edition

The title and subject matter of 2 Fast 2 Furious lends itself well to scathing reviews:Chicago Reader: "Without Diesel's brooding lunkhead presence it's more like 1/2 Fast 1/2 Furious." -- J. R. Jones New York Times: "All of these supremely expressive vehicles come equipped with drivers, principally a pair of crash-test dummies played by Paul Walker and Tyrese, whose low-gear

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Moo-la?

I just received email with the subjectline:What's a Money Making Cash Cow?What the hell, is Laffy Taffy sending spam now too? Contributor of the best punchline in the comments wins a hug.

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Let’s Summarize

Hot: Wonder Woman. Not: Miss USA. Also:In this issue: Wonder Woman vs. Posion Ivy!Pass the DramamineCanada: Land Of Very Wide DoorsSTOP DROP AND ROLL, LADY!It's nice to see MC Hammer's pants getting work

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