You know what got me after the first one? In a week, the whole pregnancy thing, the foremost thought in your mind for nine months, will be a dim memory. In five years, you’ll be at a cocktail party and will say, “Honey, were you in labor for three hours or was it thirty-three?”
Matt, ya done good, laddie! Congrats to the new family. And Dudrless, while the HUSBAND might say “Honey, were you in labor for three hours or was it thirty-three” I am pretty sure most women would remember the specific details, and would likely deck the man that dared to suggest it was forgettable!!
Congrats to the Queen for all the hard work. And you for your part in the whole affair! I’m sure the squirrely’s progress will be keenly documented on this site. That way, there will specific reasons to resent the old man during the teen years. Yay!
We have a nine month old and a cat, and if your experience is anything like ours, the two will just avoid each other for about six months, at which point the baby will want nothing more than to grab and pat (read hit) the kitty.
1) Don’t let the cat get face level with the Squirrely. Don’t let the Squirrely get face level with the cat. My six-year-old still has an eensy-beensy scar on her left cheek from the day I forgot this rule. My guilt, however, will remain until I am COLDSTIFFANDDEAD.
2) Practice saying: “Use gentle touch with the cat.” You will need this in about six months, and keep needing it until about 24 months. (You will also be saying “Use gentle touch with the Queen” and “Use gentle touch with the Yeti” around this time, too.)
3) Cat will decide the baby was NOT the most stupid thing you two have done in your collective lives about the time Squirrely is big enough to scoop dry food into the bowl. (Say, about three years.)
Squirrely: years from now you will be mad at your old man for something and he’s going to show you today’s entry and he’s going to say something like this: “I could have posted pictures of you naked, but did I? No.”
Congrats Matt! Now you will have a whole new inspiration and basis for funny musings. Steven Wright said “Boycott shampoo, demand the real poo!” but you are about to find out what the real poo really is.
There’s clearly some kind of cat mind control going on in the last photo. You’d better give El Squirrely a tinfoil hat and put bronze mesh around his crib. Filters out all those electromagnetic waves on the, um, cat frequency. Very. Harmful. And of course, many congrats.
You know that the stuff they poop in the first week isnt really poop. Its the stuff that was in the kid to begin with, Meconium I think its called, and its a blackish goo. Anyway, there’s usually a lot of it that come out and boy! does that stuff stain!
All hail the new King, King Squirrelly! Congratulations to you, Matt and to the Queen! I’ve been squirrelly-enhanced for 12 years now and it has been a blast! Hope you’re caught up on all the movies you’ve been wanting to see, cause it’s gonna be a while before you get to the next one. Keep posting, please!
I’d like to take this opportunity to offer you some child-raising advice:
When choosing a tattoo, try to find some original artwork first, because if you bring him into the tattoo parlor unprepared, you will end up with some generic “flash art” that will look terribly tacky in just a few years.
Warm congratulations and best of luck to you guys. I wish we were there in Seattle to help/laugh. But since we’re not, I’ll give you some advice from afar: take good care of the Queen, and get out of the house (all three of you) as much as you can. Welcome to the world SB!
Yay! Congrats! Best wishes to your little family. (BTW – isn’t it cool saying “We’re a family” those first few days?) Babies are precious – and seem to be little temporal anomalies. Time starts acting really wacky around them – so fast some days and so slow others.
Enjoy the little one – and don’t worry about updating the site. I think you have something just a *little* more important now! ;) And when you find time to post – if this blog turns into something similar to Lileks – so what? I love his stuff. I’ll still look forward to your blog – whatever it contains! Again, Congrats!