Movies: Eternal Sunshine Of The Spotless Mind

Ah, Memorial Day. What better time to review Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind? In the weeks after The Squirrelly was born, I noticed an interesting phenomenon. Wracked with sleep deprivation, my memory -- which barely ranks an "adequate" even under the best of circumstances -- essentially packed up and went on sabbatical. It got to the point where the

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Three Month Update

Chatting with The Queen.The Queen: Hey, when are you going to do the three month update for The Squirrelly? Me: The "three month update?" What do you mean? Q: On your site. M: Still not following. Q: On defective yeti you write those updates every month on The Squirrelly's birthday, remember? And he's three months old, now. So when are

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Chaotic Evil

FBI Warning: Al-Qaida May Possess Magic Missiles Citizens who see sticks turn to snakes should contact the authorities immediately.

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Bush Announces Twelve Step Plan For Iraq

President George Bush, speaking at the Army War College in Carlisle, Pa. yesterday, unveiled a new twelve-step plan to address the deteriorating situation in Iraq. "First, I will admit we have a problem," Bush said, signaling a stark departure from the administration's current position. "Then I will recognize that we need help, I will seek the aid of other nations,

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Rewombion

The Queen, on The Squirrelly: "He has a big nose. He must have gotten yours." There's one reason why cloning will never catch on, right there: the inability to attribute undesirable attributes in your offspring to a mate. Saturday we went to a reunion for all the parents who were in our childbirth education class. I met ten brand new

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The Golden Age

When I was your age the streets were paved with gold. And what a nightmare that was. When it rained, water would fill the deep ruts that vehicles left in the soft metal; when it was sunny, the roads became so hot that they would melt your tires as you idled at a stoplight. It always struck me as pretty

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Research Day: The “Teeth Falling Out” Dream

What's the deal with the "teeth falling out" dream?: A few times a year I have a dream in which my teeth are either loose or falling out. I'd always assumed that these dreams were unique to me, until a few years ago at a party when I overheard a girl describing just such a dream to a friend, who

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Gmail Swap

Here's you chance to learn one of the many two-player games I talk about. (Probably LotR:tC.) Update: Got one -- thanks David! Everyone else: send me mail at matthewbaldwin [monkeytail] gmail [dot] com!

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