No Draft If Bush Reelected Say Officials

Seeking to assuage fears amongst young Islamic extremists, top Al Qaeda officials vowed that the draft will not be reinstated if George W. Bush remains president of the United States. "We don't see the need, frankly, given the debacle in Iraq, the Abu Ghraib prison scandal, and the rising tide of anti-Americanism around the globe," said Al Qaeda spokesman Sulaiman

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Squirrelly’s Revenge

Okay, well, I was joking about stealing The Squirrelly's flu shot in that last post. But one thing I mentioned is true, as imposible as it sounds: it's been eight months since the kid up and got himself borned. And guess what he figured out how to do last week. Here's a hint: now when I set him down at

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Candy From A Baby

Being a new father is a lot of hard work, but it's not without its advantages. My eight-month old son is eligible for the flu vaccine that I and the vast majority of other Washingtonians cannot receive, for instance. So today I took him in to the doctor, and, just as she was giving the shot, I quickly thrust my

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Comments = Broken?

I just upgraded to Movable Type 3.1, but despite that fact that I have the "Enable Unregistered Comment Moderation" field unchecked in the configurations, it's still insisting that I approve all incoming comments. Has anyone else had this problem, and did you find a solution? If so, drop me a line ... or tempt fate by -- ha! -- letting

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Point Counterpoint

There is a woman at my bus stop who, at least once every week, wears a t-shirt reading "If you don't like my attitude, STOP TALKING TO ME!!" I've often fantasized about making and wearing a t-shirt that says "I don't like your attitude so much I'M NEVER GOING TO TALK TO YOU!!" But in my heart I know I

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Games: San Juan

As long time readers of this site know, I used to review board games in this space fairly regularly. These days, though, it's pretty rare to see a here -- not because I am playing less (although The Squirrelly does crimp my ability to stay up until 3:00 am playing Risk and drinking Pabst), but because most of my board

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Not Me!

Sales of my Impeach Dean bumper sticker have become inexplicably sluggish in the last couple months, so I'm trying to think of a way to recoup lost revenue. With the election so close, though, it's almost impossible to predict which way it's going to go. One thing is certain, however: regardless of who wins, approximately 46% of the population is

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Bad Review Revue Extra: Surviving Christmas Is Awesome!

The critics are raving about Surviving Christmas:"Absolutely awesome in its relentless mediocrity." -- Desson Thomson, WASHINGTON POST "Hans Blix is still searching for bombs, he should check out Surviving Christmas, a crass, shrill and laughless disaster of a holiday comedy with a desperately mugging Ben Affleck that should be banned under the Geneva Convention" -- Lou Lumenick, NEW YORK POST

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Jokes

I can go months without hearing a good joke, but yesterday, while trawling the Internets, I came across three that made me chuckle and/or openly weep.Q: How many Spaniards does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Juan. * * * * * Person 1: Knock knock. Person 2: Who's there? Person 1: Control freak. Person 1: Now you

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Nobody Likes A Homonym

Worst news I heard yersterday: I was in the kitchen doing dishes and The Queen was out in the living room watching TV. Suddenly, I remembered that the Red Sox / Yankees game was on. "Quick, flip to KSTW and see what the score is," I hollered. I heard the channel change, and The Queen shouted, "the Yankees won!" Best

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