Comments on: Jokes http://defectiveyeti.com/2004/10/21/jokes-2/ Haphazardly Spellchecked Since 2002 Thu, 09 Feb 2012 16:07:53 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: Nathan http://defectiveyeti.com/2004/10/21/jokes-2/comment-page-6/#comment-23074 Nathan Mon, 25 Oct 2004 20:09:58 +0000 http://defectiveyeti.com/?p=2825#comment-23074 Best. Thread. EVER. (And I can't believe someone else knows the "Got any grapes?" one.) Q: What's green, has wheels, and grows around the house? A: Grass. . . . . . (I lied about the wheels.) Best. Thread. EVER. (And I can’t believe someone else knows the “Got any grapes?” one.)

Q: What’s green, has wheels, and grows around the house?

A: Grass.
.
.
.
.
.
(I lied about the wheels.)

]]> By: lordhorror http://defectiveyeti.com/2004/10/21/jokes-2/comment-page-6/#comment-23073 lordhorror Mon, 25 Oct 2004 20:08:13 +0000 http://defectiveyeti.com/?p=2825#comment-23073 A chunk of concrete walks into a bar and orders a pint from the barman. Suddenly, a strip of tarmac walks into the bar and the concrete quickly leaps behind the bar to hide. The barman asks "What's up with you mate? You're twice the size of him." The concrete looks up and says "Yeah, but you don't know him like I do...he's a cyclepath!" Boom and indeed boom. A chunk of concrete walks into a bar and orders a pint from the barman. Suddenly, a strip of tarmac walks into the bar and the concrete quickly leaps behind the bar to hide. The barman asks “What’s up with you mate? You’re twice the size of him.” The concrete looks up and says “Yeah, but you don’t know him like I do…he’s a cyclepath!”

Boom and indeed boom.

]]> By: lordhorror http://defectiveyeti.com/2004/10/21/jokes-2/comment-page-6/#comment-23072 lordhorror Mon, 25 Oct 2004 20:08:08 +0000 http://defectiveyeti.com/?p=2825#comment-23072 A chunk of concrete walks into a bar and orders a pint from the barman. Suddenly, a strip of tarmac walks into the bar and the concrete quickly leaps behind the bar to hide. The barman asks "What's up with you mate? You're twice the size of him." The concrete looks up and says "Yeah, but you don't know him like I do...he's a cyclepath!" Boom and indeed boom. A chunk of concrete walks into a bar and orders a pint from the barman. Suddenly, a strip of tarmac walks into the bar and the concrete quickly leaps behind the bar to hide. The barman asks “What’s up with you mate? You’re twice the size of him.” The concrete looks up and says “Yeah, but you don’t know him like I do…he’s a cyclepath!”

Boom and indeed boom.

]]> By: Starrygirl http://defectiveyeti.com/2004/10/21/jokes-2/comment-page-6/#comment-23071 Starrygirl Mon, 25 Oct 2004 19:58:28 +0000 http://defectiveyeti.com/?p=2825#comment-23071 Always loved this one...... An extremely modest man was in the hospital for a series of tests, the last of which had left his system extremely upset. Upon making several false-alarm trips to the bathroom, he decided the latest was yet another and stayed put. Unfortunately for him, this wasn't a false alarm and he soiled his bed linens terribly. He was embarrassed beyond his ability to remain rational. Losing his presence of mind, he jumped up, gathered the bed sheets, and threw them out the hospital window. A drunk was walking by the hospital when the sheets landed on him. He started yelling, cursing and swinging his arms wildly, which left the soiled sheets in a tangled pile at his feet. As the drunk stood there, staring down at the sheets, a security guard who had watched the whole incident walked up and asked, "What the hell was that all about?" Still staring down, the drunk replied: "I think I just beat the crap out of a ghost!" Always loved this one……

An extremely modest man was in the hospital for a series of tests, the last of which had left his system extremely upset. Upon making several false-alarm trips to the bathroom, he decided the latest was yet another and stayed put. Unfortunately for him, this wasn’t a false alarm and he soiled his bed linens terribly. He was embarrassed beyond his ability to remain rational. Losing his presence of mind, he jumped up, gathered the bed sheets, and threw them out the hospital window.

A drunk was walking by the hospital when the sheets landed on him. He started yelling, cursing and swinging his arms wildly, which left the soiled sheets in a tangled pile at his feet.

As the drunk stood there, staring down at the sheets, a security guard who had watched the whole incident walked up and asked, “What the hell was that all about?”

Still staring down, the drunk replied: “I think I just beat the crap out of a ghost!”

]]> By: lordhorror http://defectiveyeti.com/2004/10/21/jokes-2/comment-page-6/#comment-23070 lordhorror Mon, 25 Oct 2004 19:51:46 +0000 http://defectiveyeti.com/?p=2825#comment-23070 First the dodo died, Then Di and Dodi died. Dido must be cra**ing herself. First the dodo died, Then Di and Dodi died. Dido must be cra**ing herself.

]]> By: meeblek http://defectiveyeti.com/2004/10/21/jokes-2/comment-page-6/#comment-23069 meeblek Mon, 25 Oct 2004 19:41:53 +0000 http://defectiveyeti.com/?p=2825#comment-23069 How do you piss off some feminists?? Go into NOW headquarters and yell, "WHICH ONE OF YOU CUTE LITTLE CUPCAKES WANTS TO COME HOME, COOK ME DINNER AND GIVE ME A BLOWJOB?!" How do you piss off some feminists??

Go into NOW headquarters and yell, “WHICH ONE OF YOU CUTE LITTLE CUPCAKES WANTS TO COME HOME, COOK ME DINNER AND GIVE ME A BLOWJOB?!”

]]> By: Jon http://defectiveyeti.com/2004/10/21/jokes-2/comment-page-6/#comment-23068 Jon Mon, 25 Oct 2004 19:37:16 +0000 http://defectiveyeti.com/?p=2825#comment-23068 Confucius say: Man who walks through airport security sideways is going to Bangkok. Confucius say: Man who walks through airport security sideways is going to Bangkok.

]]> By: meeblek http://defectiveyeti.com/2004/10/21/jokes-2/comment-page-6/#comment-23067 meeblek Mon, 25 Oct 2004 19:33:20 +0000 http://defectiveyeti.com/?p=2825#comment-23067 Q: what's the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of dead babies? A: You can only unload one of the trucks with a pitchfork Q: what’s the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of dead babies?

A: You can only unload one of the trucks with a pitchfork

]]> By: XLT http://defectiveyeti.com/2004/10/21/jokes-2/comment-page-6/#comment-23066 XLT Mon, 25 Oct 2004 19:29:55 +0000 http://defectiveyeti.com/?p=2825#comment-23066 The other night I ate at a German/Chinese restaurant. An hour later I was hungry...for POWER! The other night I ate at a German/Chinese restaurant.

An hour later I was hungry…for POWER!

]]> By: Jon http://defectiveyeti.com/2004/10/21/jokes-2/comment-page-6/#comment-23065 Jon Mon, 25 Oct 2004 19:29:13 +0000 http://defectiveyeti.com/?p=2825#comment-23065 Two ducks are running along on the sidewalk, one of them sees a low-hanging tree branch up ahead and yells, "PEOPLE!" [what would people yell?] Two ducks are running along on the sidewalk, one of them sees a low-hanging tree branch up ahead and yells, “PEOPLE!”

[what would people yell?]

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