Hooked Up

After years of living as veritable savages, The Queen and I finally got high-speed Internet access. Yes, this is a stark break from my usual neoluddist tendencies, such as preferring board to computer games, my steadfast refusal to acquire a cell phone, and my frequent visits to ASCII porn sites. (Warning: Last link is NSFW if your monitor's resolution is

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Blue Moon Rising

I hate it when people talk about mundane, everyday matters on their blogs. What's why I long ago decided that defective yeti would only be used to record the truly extraordinary events of my life. Today, for instance, I voluntarily ate a salad for lunch.

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In Which Predictions Are Made And Fulfilled

Me: Look, gmail now has built-in chat functionality. After years of avoiding the siren song of Instant Messaging it has now been unwillingly foisted upon me, and I therefore have no choice but to use my newly acquired powers to pester you at work. I shall do so every half an hour from this day forward. L: You're bluffing. M:

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The Bad Review Revue

American Dreamz: "The jokes don't just fizzle into insignificance; they flop about with gaudy ineffectualness, gasping for air like newly landed trout." Manohla Dargis, NEW YORK TIMES Date Movie: "Rated PG-13 because 13 is the maximum age of those who might find it funny." -- Kyle Smith, NEW YORK POST Failure To Launch: "Apocalyptically awful romantic comedy." -- Stephen Rea,

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Research Day: Portable Signs and Dem Bones, Dem Bones

What's the deal with all the people standing on street corners holding "24 Fitness" signs? I don't know how things are in your hometown but, in the not-to-distant past, the corners of every major intersection of Seattle were populated by people holding cardboard signs signs readings "STUCK IN SEATTLE AND AS IMPROBABLE AS IT SOUNDS I ONLY NEED $1.47 MORE

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Friday Afternoon Scratchpad

Tap Dance This Domestic Surveillance story is the gift that keeps on giving. First they assured us that they weren't tapping any phones without a warrant; then we discover that, well, okay, they were recording some conversations without a warrant, but only a few; now come to find out that the phone records of millions of Americans were requisitioned. It's

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