Cacophony

Three musical instruments are sitting in a bar and, after a few drinks, they begin boasting.

“I don’t want to brag,” says the first, “but I’m a drum. And drums, as I’m sure you know, were the first instruments in the history of the world, used not only for music but also for long range communication and even to motivate soldiers in a time of war. Just about every style of music uses drums of some sort — hell, there probably wouldn’t even be music it if wasn’t for us.”

“Drums are great, if you only want to play one note,” the second instrument cuts in. “But as piano, I have 88 keys to choose from. Most of the great classical music was written with me in mind, and even today my cousin, the keyboard, is central to the creation of modern music.”

“Don’t talk to me about modern music,” scoffs the third instrument. “I’m a guitar, and while you old-timers may have been big in your day, it’s the 21st century now. And it’s guitars like me that have made rock & roll the most popular music in the world today.”

The second instrument sizes up the third skeptically, and then says “What are you talking about? You’re not a guitar, you’re nothing but a small harp.”

And the third instrument leaps off of his stool and shouts, “Are you calling me a lyre?!”

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