The Adventure of the Missing Stocking

The writers of the hit TV series LOST (with my, um, help) take time out their busy schedule to write a a new Sherlock Holmes mystery.


  1. Brilliant. Only one thing — not enough flashbacks.

  2. Throw in a couple of cylons, and you have a Battlestar Galactica story arc.

  3. That was brilliant. Finally someone constructs a way to ask the original Holmes if he’s For Real.

  4. Only two criticisms, Matthew; one, there was no deluge of new, confusing and highly superfluous characters introduced during the narrative; and two, your characters engaged in dialog and moved the “plot” forward at least a little bit – the real writers of LOST would have resorted to many more silent, meaningful glares that are meant to convey a solemnity and seriousness of occasion, but do nothing whatsoever to advance the audience’s comprehension of the “story” or, in fact, to entertain in anyway.

    Does that sound like I’m a bit bitter?

  5. Clever, caustic and well written. Thanks for this.

  6. Why would cocaine make Sherlock Holmes sleepy? Cocaine is a stimulant.

  7. Awesome.

  8. A conspicuous absence of the word “singular,” but other than that you had me going until the hippo bit.

  9. Hehehehe. Brilliant.

  10. “Egress” is a noun, dude. You can’t “egress” from anything. You can “effect your egress” from something, I guess.

  11. Main Entry: egress
    Pronunciation: E-‘gres
    Function: intransitive verb
    : to go or come out

  12. David: I think he was thinking of morphine.

  13. Just had to tell you that I very much enjoy this blog. I spent this past Saturday laughing out loud so much that tears of joy sprang from my eyeballs. I was reading “favorite posts”. I kept reading the punch lines out loud to my husband. The Queen is my hero.

    Carry on.

  14. A reasonable satire of much of the second season through last November, but, if you’ve been watching since the break, I hope you’ll agree that the writers have advanced the plot quite a bit, and coherently at that. It’s back in my top three shows. I’d love to see you parody 24, surely the riper show for satire.