Posts from April 2007.

dycs

Of course, the best thing about getting a scanner:

Atheist President

Now I can go mano a mano with xkcd. WATCH YOUR BACK HYPER-INTELLIGENT STICK-FIGURE-DRAWING GEEK MAN!

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I Got A Scanner!

Further cementing my reputation as a “tardy-adopter,” today I bought a scanner, only a single decade after they became mandatory for any self-respecting geek.

First picture scanned:

Dad and I

My father and I, October, 1971.

Not only is Pa Baldwin an all-around great guy, but he’s also a regular reader of this site. Hi dad!

Update: “Don’t you have a similar picture of you and the Squiggle? I think a side-by-side comparison would be nice here.”

Generations

Extrapolations: every generation of Baldwin will have shorter hair, a higher BMI, and more ridiculous headgear.

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Egged On

The vending machine at my work contains Hershey’s Ultimate Soft-Baked Cookies.

From a marketing standpoint, I guess the name “Soft-Baked Cookies” is catchier than “Undercooked Pastries.” Though not as clever as “Salmo-Nilla Wafers.”

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Seattle

Apparently defective yeti was name-checked in the Seattle Post-Intelligencer today.

My Seattle-related posts are available here. This is a good one. I like this one too.

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Job Titles You Could Put in the “Occupation” Field of Your Tax Return to Exact Some Small Measure of Revenge on a Random IRS Employee by Getting an Irritating Song Stuck in His or Her Head

Paperback Writer
Cradle of Love Rocker
Country Boy (thank god!)
Business Caretaker
Smooth Operator
Smooth Criminal
Move Buster
Mr. Tally Man
Pack Leader
Careless Whisperer
Thriller
Boy of Summer
Tiny Dancer
Tambourine Man
Yellow Submariner
Banjo Dueler
Right To Party Advocate
Lover (part-time)
Tubthumper
Kung Fu Fighter
Guy who wrote the jingle for the “Kit-Kat” commericals
Dancing Queen
Port Commissioner of Funkytown
Sexual Healer
Eggman / Walrus

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Lowest Form of Humor

Q: What does a copy editor do when she’s not feeling well?

A: Calls inn [sic].

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Encounter at the Intersection of Maudlin and Geek

Squiggle and I are strolling through a park, and I am singing Daisy Bell to him. As I near the end of the song, we approach a middle-aged woman, who is walking briskly in the opposite direction. She suddenly stops dead in her tracks and stares, dumbfounded, as I belt out the last few words.

Woman: Were … were you just singing “Bicycle Built For Two?”

Me: Yes.

Woman: Oh my God. My name is Daisy. My great-grandmother used to sing that song to me when I was a little girl, and I don’t think I’ve heard anyone else sing it in, like, forty years! How do you know the words? Did someone sing it to you when you were a child?

Me: Ahhhh, no. It’s the song HAL 9000 sings as he dies.

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A Modest Proposal

Internet Access Captchas

Note: If the proposal is accepted, this will likely be my last post.

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Interview’d

Jon of Ransom Note Typography conducted a rather lengthy interview with me. It is available here.

My friend The Other Matthew also talked to me for a class project. That interview can be found here. I did not actually verify that the perl code would compile before I sent it; if you discover that it does not, I don’t want to hear about it.

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Passé Pix

Spam:

Received: Mon, 2 Apr 2007 03:55:41 +0100
To: matthew@defectiveyeti.com
From: sexspfr@mst-nets.ch
Subject: Britney spears pussy pix!!

Man, I kind of feel sorry for this guy. It must be like trying to sell rotary phones.

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