Secret Service

“Look, I promise to never take your ‘secret’ path to the oval office. Can I please just open my eyes?”

Provide your caption in the comments. Photo and idea swiped from kokogiak.


  1. “You’re no longer part of the System. You’re above the System. Over it. Beyond it. We’re ‘them.’ We’re ‘they.'”

  2. “You know the difference between you and me? I make this look good.” (That was the better Men in Black quote.)

  3. “I swear to Christ, call me Osama ONE more time, and this shit’s getting real.”

  4. “No, George, I can’t believe you haven’t got this yet – it’s pronounced new-clear, not nu-ku-lar.”

  5. The Colonel wins, already.

  6. “Man, I kinda wish he would shut up about winning the election. It’s great and all, but he’s using too many big words.”

  7. I’m having that nightmare again…

  8. Hello. And Bye.

  9. “Hey, New Guy! When you said “substantive,” I thought you meant you were bringing hoagies. This presidentin’ is hard work!

  10. And then it turns out the chick is really a DUDE! Did you know Forest Whitaker endorsed me way back in the primaries?

  11. “…and then I said that McCain voted with you, like, 90% of the time. It worked so great, I kept using it! George, are you listening? Wait up…”

  12. Well, you can tell by the way I use my walk,
    Im a woman’s man: no time to talk.

  13. “Mr. President, please, I really don’t need to see the annotated ‘George W. Bush Presidential collection of ear wax’ ”

  14. O: *Adults in Peanuts cartoon sounds*

    W: (Ies ahscared.)- thought bubble.

  15. “Holy sh’t, what did Cheney EAT?!?”

  16. “Holy sh’t, what did Cheney EAT?!?”

  17. O: Mr. President, let me explain this to you again. Your presidency ends in January and then it will be my turn. Like sharing, sort of.

    W: No, no. I am President forever. I am not listening lalalalalalalla.

  18. Now, I appreciate your generous offer, but I will need you to remove the air hockey table, as well as the dartboard with Helen Thomas’ picture…

  19. “Look, I know I was supposed to wear the tie with the dots on it, but I had soup for lunch…”

  20. GWB: “Hey, this is kind of fun. You say they call this ‘the robot’? Show me more of your people’s dances.”

  21. “Well, kind of like that. Actually his hands were probably on top of the desk. And, there was something about a cigar.”

  22. GWB: “Do you like trucks?! I like trucks. Trucks are awesome. Wanna see my room?! Cheney doesn’t come hang out anymore. Wanna play Risk? Stratego? Chutes and Ladders? Are you crying?”

    BO: “Little bit.”

  23. O: You’re puttin’ off some negative vibes here, George, are you sure there are no Skinheads waitin’ for me in the Oval Office?

  24. “I swear, my turd was *this* big. I had to ask Michelle to get the hedge clippers from the garage…”


  25. GWB thinking:
    *GAWD I am so tired. It sure is tiring ruining an entire country in a matter of a few years. Haha, look at this guy behind me. Sooo naive, so clueless… walking with your eyes shut and praying for the best won’t work. You’re fuuuucked*

  26. No, really, please take the Eric Carle books with you…

  27. GEORGE!!! What did you eat for LUNCH??!? PHEWWWWW!!!!

  28. @Chrissy: Gross but hysterical. Worthy of Yeti himself.

  29. If I had known they were going to send me out on mission with *you*, I’d have never become a Mormon!

  30. The blind leading the blind.

  31. Barack: …anyway, I really think if we just engage the Syrians to oppose Iran….

    George (thought bubble): Yeah, yeah. Heard it before. Call Dick up and tell him.

  32. “You seriously believed Cheney when he said that you had to follow him around like this?”

  33. O: Just think about it George, it’d be brilliant.
    G: Thinking to himself “I am so friggin’ tired of thinking”

  34. Exact Twins except for the ties.

  35. dude you know what I’m talking about! soy desole

  36. Heh. He thinks I give a shit what he wants to do with Putin’s weenie. Wait’ll he sees the damn thing.

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