Posts from February 2012.

Live to Fight

Story I heard from Sheila Davis:

Last weekend I attended Ghengis Con in Denver. During a game one of the other participants told me of his experience at a previous convention.

He’d signed up as Gamemaster for a good old-fashioned dungeon crawl, and drew the morning slot. Only one person showed up at the time of the game, but they decided to play anyway.

Talking to the player, the GM learned that the gentleman was unfamiliar with the game. In fact he’d never roleplayed before, and had no idea what the hobby was about. He and his wife lived in one of the small mountain towns of the Rockies, and every few months they’d drive into Denver to see what was happening. He’d discovered the game convention while his wife was at a doll show and, thinking it sounded fun, decided to drop in.

The GM handed the player a character sheet for a stalwart Ranger, gave him a brief overview of play, and they were off. When the player ran into his first monster, the Gamemaster helpfully pointed out the Ranger’s skill in archery and swordplay.

“So what do you want to do?” the GM asked.

The player studied his character sheet. “It says I can do bird calls,” he noted.

“That’s right,” the GM replied, somewhat puzzled.

“OK. I do a bird call to distract the monster, and then sneak past him.”

The fellow rolled the dice and successfully evaded the monster. In fact, over the course of the game, the player cleverly avoided every monster in the dungeon, with nary an arrow fired or sword unsheathed.

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SotL Valentines

Guess what film turned 21 today.

Previously: Darwinian Valentines, Golden Girls Valentines.

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Twitter Tuesday


First full day of world peace, and I’ve got to admit it’s been pretty sweet. Thanks Madonna!!
@matthewbaldwin
Matthew Baldwin


Small dogs are overpriced luxury items that are adored well beyond their utility. Kinda surprised Apple hasn’t tapped that market.
@matthewbaldwin
Matthew Baldwin


Good people want their funeral to be a celebration. Bad people need not worry.
@matthewbaldwin
Matthew Baldwin


First bike ride of the year, first sundresses of the year. My tank of optimism is again on F.
@matthewbaldwin
Matthew Baldwin


We should emphasize the fun parts of existentialism by calling ourselves yay!theists.
@matthewbaldwin
Matthew Baldwin


I am a high energy individual, insofar as fat is stored energy.
@matthewbaldwin
Matthew Baldwin



The Facebook IPO gives you the unique opportunity to own part of a company that sells you as its product.
@matthewbaldwin
Matthew Baldwin


What’s the difference between orange juice and a child with ADD? You can make orange juice concentrate.
@matthewbaldwin
Matthew Baldwin


I invented a web browser for sharks. There’s no Back button, only Forward.
@matthewbaldwin
Matthew Baldwin

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Fight the Power Windows

A cop pulled me over on my way to work this morning.

“You aren’t wearing your seat belt,” he said after approaching my window. “Did you just forget?”

“No officer, I was raging against the machine using the only mechanism available to a 40-year-old middle-manager in an SUV,” I replied but not really.

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