The defective yeti How To Drink Without Becoming An Alcoholic Program<\/u><\/p>\n
My coworker told me his new year’s resolution: he had decided to only drink once a week.<\/p>\n
No, I replied. No, no, no. I tried this, and it’s a bad idea, here’s why: one, you’ll fall off the wagon by February 13; and two, you’ll probably fall off the wagon by January 27.<\/p>\n
Besides: you’re supposed<\/em> to drink every day — Science says so. That why I thunk up The defective yeti How To Drink Without Becoming An Alcoholic Program, and have more-or-less adhered to it for a couple of years. It has worked so well for me I’d be remiss not to share it with the world.<\/p>\n So here it is. Are you ready? Okay, write this down:<\/p>\n No more than one drink a day except for one time a week.<\/tt><\/p><\/blockquote>\n That’s it! You get your Science-prescribed daily-glass-o-red-wine and you get your weekly three-beers-with-the-buddies outing.<\/p>\n The trick is to remember the caveat: “No carryovers!!” If you forego your nightly drink, you don’t get two the following day (unless it’s your designated “one than one” binge). Likewise, you only get a single “more than one” day per calendar week — no carryovers!!<\/p>\n Works for me. Speaking of drinking, I recently walked from the Rendezvous to my bus stop at around 11:00 at night, following one of my aforementioned three-beers-with-the-buddies outings. As the Rendezvous is on 2nd and Bell and my bus stop was on 4th and Stewart, this necessitated travel through some Seattle’s Sketchy Neighborhoods, so I reflexively adopted my Badass Motherfucker gait, a mode of walking that involves long strides, a puffed-up chest, and lots of scowling.<\/p>\n (Note: I was raised in the suburbs, so my perception of a Sketchy Neighborhood is probably way skewed. I consider any block that doesn’t contain a Dairy Queen, a Blockbuster or an antique store to be a “Sketchy Neighborhood”. But work with me, here.)<\/p>\n At some point I got the munchies and dug some food left over from my lunch out of my backpack. I began snacking on that as I walked.<\/p>\n But then I saw my reflection in a store window, and realized that my choice of foodstuff pretty much negated any advantage gained by my strutting. Because here is a 100% true fact, folks: nobody looks like a Badass Motherfucker while eating baby carrots. In recent weeks I have been sneaking links onto my sidebar. I was being all stealthy ‘n’ shit because, in most cases, I was embarrassed they weren’t there already. But I’ll fess up:<\/p>\n Sites that really should have been in the sidebar since the inception of this site<\/b>: Dooce<\/a>, Que Sera Sera<\/a> and I, Asshole<\/a>. I have no excuse.<\/p>\n Update<\/b>: Holy crow, I just realized that I never put Choire Sicha<\/a> on my sidebar. Whatta idiot. Me, I mean, not Choire. Anyway, he’s there now. Dumb dumb dumb. Uh: again, that means me.<\/p>\n Sites that have been around for a while but, for some reason or another, I only recently discovered<\/b>: Public Defender Dude<\/a>, Coudal<\/a>, Dong Resin’s Joint<\/a>.<\/p>\n Newish sites by cool people<\/b>: WULAD<\/a> , Danger Blog<\/a>.<\/p>\n
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