The Queen rubs the top of her head and makes the ow-that-hurts air-through-the-teeth noise.<\/p>\n
Me<\/b>: What’s wrong?<\/p>\n
Q<\/b>: I have a bump on my head and it’s getting bigger. Feel it.<\/p>\n
{I engage in some impromptu phrenology}<\/p>\n
M<\/b>: Wow, that’s a good ‘un. How did you get it?<\/p>\n
Q<\/b>: I got hit by a block of ice.<\/p>\n
M<\/b>: Did it knock you out cold?<\/p>\n
Q<\/b>: It’s not funny.<\/p>\n
M<\/b>: Sorry. What happened?<\/p>\n
Q<\/b>: I wanted to pack the cooler for our weekend camping trip, so I went to the grocery store and bought a big block of ice. As I was walking back to the car I tumbled — honestly I don’t know what happened, I just suddenly went ass over teakettle — and when I threw my arms up the ice flew into the air. Then, after I landed on my butt, the block of ice came down and hit me on the top of the head.<\/p>\n
{Pause}<\/p>\n
Q<\/b>: What?<\/p>\n
M<\/b>: Nothing, I’m just waiting for the part of the story that’s not funny.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
The Queen rubs the top of her head and makes the ow-that-hurts air-through-the-teeth noise. Me: What’s wrong? Q: I have a bump on my head and it’s getting bigger. Feel it. {I engage in some impromptu phrenology} M: Wow, that’s a good ‘un. How did you get it? Q: I got hit by a block […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[10,17],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-3231","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-conversations","category-the-queen"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/defectiveyeti.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3231","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/defectiveyeti.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/defectiveyeti.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/defectiveyeti.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/defectiveyeti.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3231"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/defectiveyeti.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3231\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/defectiveyeti.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3231"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/defectiveyeti.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3231"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/defectiveyeti.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3231"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}