Johns Across America

Hah hah! You’ve probably seen this already, but the New York Post completely blew the VP call this morning:

Boy, I bet they feel stupid!

Here are the actual candidates being asked to rate their charisma on a scale of 1 to 5:

Jeeze, I can’t imagine why the DNC thought the campaign needed more energy. I mean, look at that thumbs up. That’s nearly a full knuckle’s worth of enthusaism, right there.

Overall I’m pleased that Edwards got the nod, although, truth be told, these guys would be my first choice if I could put any two Johns in the White House.

Kerry at a recent rally:

“Dude, I only asked for a flag this big.”

14 thoughts to “Johns Across America”

  1. In a related story, Howard dean was quoted as saying “Dude where’s my candidacy

  2. As a guy named John, I expect to take an equal share of power in America’s new John-ocracy.

    So … that should be coming in the mail in January … right, guys?

  3. Yes, the RNC gets all high and mighty over Edwards’ lack of experience. IIRC, Shrub had less when he was elected what with the one term as governor of a “weak governor” state.

    Anyhoo…Johns. Yes, I’m rather partial to johns. Wait. That doesn’t sound very good…. ;-)

  4. Speaking of Johns we’d rather see in the White House, you must buy the squirrelly They Might Be Giants’ “NO!” which is the best kids album ever.

    (Well, OK, the one by Brave Combo with The Chicken Dance on it doesn’t suck.)

  5. Edwards, huh?

    I really don’t like his ‘Crossing Over’ show, but maybe he’ll be a good VP.

  6. Too bad the Post’s report isn’t true. I would’ve loved to see Jeffy debating Cheney. “Who started this mess in Iraq? Not Me! Who made a shambles of the budget and ballooned the defecit? Not Me!”

  7. For a chilling appraisal of what happens when everyone in an influential political organization is named John, I refer you to the documentary “Buckaroo Bonzai Across the Eighth Dimension.”

  8. BUSH was this big !!! I swear we were in the locker room and dam that TEXAN is huge

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